Blog Post by Barb McPhee
Barb is a member of the Poverty Task Force, sits on the Steering Committee, co-chairs Community Voices, and is an  Advance Your Voice speaker.

What a lovely concept, “Home Sweet Home”. But what does that really mean?

A white picket fence? A cardboard box? A two-bedroom condo? Or, wherever I lay my head! With all the homeless people and folks living in less than adequate accommodations – is this concept of a home out of reach for most?

In the dictionary, the definition of a HOUSE is a building for human habitation.

The definition of a HOME is the place where one lives permanently.

So here I am, living in a HOUSE, and wanting so desperately to be living in a HOME. But I am afraid to see what the struggle will be to have a home when it has been a horrific journey just to get a house.

All my life I have been living in a house. Growing up in my Grandmother’s basement along with 5 other kids and 2 parents was just a house. A house filled with love nonetheless, but just a house.

When I became a teenager we were lucky enough to move into a 4 bedroom house – still a little crowded for 8 people, but we made it work. But there was no security since my dad was the only bread-winner, so again it was just a house. Then I got married and moved into many houses, moving 7 times in 15 years.  No home there – a divorce – but no home.

I got re-married common-law style and Bear moved into my housing unit at 15 Willow Road and we raised my two children and his three children together, hoping desperately that this would be my “home sweet home.”  But, Bear got cancer and 2 years later passed away.

The next move was back to my childhood house as my mother had also passed away and suddenly there was plenty of room for me and my dad.  But he too got sick with lung cancer and 2 years later he passed away.

There I was, 57 years of age with mobility issues and health problems, and I didn’t even have a house – let alone a home.

Couch Surfing, basement crawling, trailer park living with friends and family is not what I would call living, existing, maybe. But that is what I had to do, so I did it.

I drove housing services crazy with all the phone calls and emails and questions! I had already been on the housing list for 3 years, something had to come up… but of course that was not the case. I got a small break when they called me and told me I was accepted to the Housing Assistance Program (HAP) which would top up my rent a certain amount each month for a ten year period. That made it a bit easier in trying to find an affordable apartment – but accessibility was an issue as there are not a lot of buildings out there looking out for us older cripples.

I found one apartment, but housing had to say no as the unit was not legally registered with the city.  Soon, I had only 3 days left at the shelter so I started to raise my concerns with housing and luckily they had just gotten a call from an apartment building that had a one-bedroom available.  So, after jumping through hoops of burning fire and spending some time in the lion’s den, I was able to sign a lease and get a house – soon maybe to be my home?

Not likely. Truthfully, I took on the apartment because I was desperate and did not want to continue this journey any farther. I did not see the big picture and all the added costs such as water heater rental, parking, heat and hydro. I guess this is where I get lots of use out of my sweaters and socks to keep the heat down and start on another diet because there is no money left for food.

Finally with a roof over my head, I guess you could then say that the roof sprouted a leak… I just lost my job to re-structuring.

My saving grace in all of these struggles was when June Hofland stood up at the Poverty Symposium at St. Georges Church in 2009 and said “Why are we just talking about poverty? Let’s do something about it!”  I was one of the first people to sign up. I sat on the Community Engagement Working Group of the new Guelph-Wellington Task Force for Poverty Elimination and we created the Community Voices group. There is nowhere else that I would rather be than with this courageous group who may not be able to find me a home, but certainly make me feel at home.  As a graduate of the Advance Your Voice Course that was provided by the Task Force and with the driving force of the Community Voices group, I have learned to not stress about my poverty struggles, but to use them to help fight my demons as well as guide others to stand up to theirs.

So maybe, just maybe, with the launch of the County’s 10 year Housing and Homelessness Plan I will be able to take “HOME sweet HOME” off my bucket-list before I kick it (the bucket that is).

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